"Maybe if you go to bed you’ll feel better in the morning" is literally just the human version of "Have you tried turning it off and back on again?"
what have you done
read my creepy pasta, its about a game i get from a garage sale and its starts doing creepy sh*t, but i keep playing it like a fucking dumb ass
just stick your hands in boiling hot coffee. go on. do it. just shove your fingers on in that blistering hot cuppa joe. throw an egg in there. who gives a shit. eat your god damn coffee eggs like the stupid slobbering idiot that you are
thIS WHOLE FUCKING ARTICLE
How to ruin your children’s porn step 1
That’s parenting done right
Can’t hold it back anymore.
I’VE BEEN LAUGHING AT THIS SINCE 1902
Hans: A Summary
(partial credit to jamie)
HE ISN’T ALLOWED TO DO THE THING WHERE HE MAKES EYE CONTACT WITH ME THROUGH THE SCREEN BECAUSE WHAT HAPPENS IS I GET HEART PALPITATIONS AND CRY.
but guys, you realize Morgan Freeman had to read those lines
LOOK AT THE GUY HOLDING THE MICROPHONE
I think there is a glitch in the matrix
winter is coming